numb

Tonight, as I drove to and from work, I came to the realization that something in my life needs to change. I live most of my life for myself and I've almost forgotten to work on my relationship with God. I never seem to have time for Him anymore, and it's spiritually killing me. I want so badly to change, but I don't. And Im not really sure how. All I know is there's more to this so called Christian life I've been living, and I am on a mission to find out how to obtain it. Whether it be through just spending more time with Him or giving my entire life to focus on Him. Im ready to finally surrender..Im sick of living this hypocrisy and I want to be free. 

I love you Jesus. Forgive me for becoming numb. Please become the love of my life again. Consume me, Lord. I can't live without you.